humour

Day 53 – Door 2

My feelings towards rehanging doors have not improved over the last 24 hours.

Here’s an extract from a conversation I had with myself earlier.

Me 1: What were they thinking?
Me 2: Who?
Me 1: I hope that the current doors of whoever spent the last thirty years painting over the hinges squeak really loudly.
Me 2: Didn’t we have this conversation yesterday?
Me 1: I also need to take off a few centimetres from the bottom of the door.
Me 2: Don’t you mean millimetres? Please don’t take off centimetres.
Me 1: Millimetres, silly. Oh God, that’s just the sort of thing I’d do isn’t it.
Me 2:
Me 1: Hmm. A jigsaw just isn’t going to cut it. (Laughs at unintended pun).
Me 2: You need a planer.
Me 1: I’m sure there must be a tool perfect for this job.
Me 2: Yes, it’s called a planer.
Me 1: I wonder what YouTube says.
Me 2: It’ll say buy a planer.
Me 1: People seem to be using a planer.
Me 2: Are you even listening to me?
Me 5: I wouldn’t bother Number Two. I gave up a long time ago and I’ve slowly slipped down the rankings of internal conversationalists.
Me 1: Excellent. It’ll be here tomorrow.
Me 2: You did measure and mark off how much needs cutting off before you removed it right?

Stay measured, stay safe.